If I could re-write the job description of a professional runner it would read as follows: make the Olympic team, win races, influence people to buy your shoes, share the journey, and give back to the people who give a crap about you. Many coaches and pro athletes might not see the point in sharing their training, their struggles and their triumphs. I guess I have never believed that if someone sees my times and paces they will have an advantage over me in a race. The reality is I’m either fit and ready or I’m not and sharing that won’t change the result. Some have also perceived sharing as bragging about your times and accomplishments. I never saw it like this. I see it as educating, entertaining, and motivating the running community that fills the stadiums, lines the streets cheering, and follows you through ups and downs.
And sure it’s scary to share at times because what if you fail in your goals, don’t live up to what you’ve been training for. Will people think you’re full of it, stop believing in you? Some maybe. But you’re not in it for those people. You’re in it for yourself and for the people who are moved by you. The people who are blown away by your times but enamored by your authenticity and vulnerability. Because they see you beyond a perfect lens, full of faults. And that shit is relatable. Just like the crap on my legs at mile 22 in the Chicago Marathon.
But where sharing does make an impact is on the fans, the ones filling the stadiums we race in, filling the streets we run down. The ones trying to relate in some tiny way. I receive emails and messages like many pros do but one recently resonated with me. It read: “thank you for sharing your journey. It has lifted the veil on elite athletes, (and this may sound dumb) I’ve found that I believe in my abilities more. I have had the bravery to take more risks, to let go of self-imposed expectations that contribute to a negative self image. I have found the joy, the passion, and the beauty in running again.” If I can make just one imprint on someone like this, I know it is all worth it.
A few years ago a post came up about me that I was just this “mommy blogger” pretending to be a pro runner with mediocre class times. Understandable. From 2013-2015 I was absent from the sport, pregnant with my 2 sons, and clawing my way back to post partum running. I could have stayed hidden. I could have not told you my first run 8 weeks post partum lasted 3 minutes and I just about had my uterus fall out. I could have not shared that my stomach was so separated, people asked me how far along I was at 12 weeks post partum? I could have kept quiet that I was embarrassed about my new body and thought it was failing me. That I wanted to pursue my athletic passions, but I was guilty for leaving home and pumping breast milk on my way to the workout. My workouts that never clicked, my race results that were lack luster. For 3 years. I wanted to throw in the towel. But I also wanted to prove I could come back from 2 babies and not have an asterisk next to my name “that’s a good result for being a mom.” I vowed during this time to leave a mark on the sport beyond my results. That started with blogging. And here we are 4 years later, and I’m still “mommy blogging.” And I’m also pushing my limits, and setting PRs at 36. I’m doing things I didn’t know possible, and I love sharing it. Because I can run 26.2 miles at 5:38 per mile. And I was 19 seconds away from making the US Olympic Team. And yes I’m getting older each year and sometimes the doubt creeps in, will my time be up in the sport soon? Maybe. But for now I’m still standing here, mommy blogging, and I still have a lot more to accomplish.”
Dream Big
Steph Bruce